Being Chinese

Friendship? Always been a puzzling word.  Through the years I have been fortunate enough to have some real good friends.  But I’m finding that as I got older, I’ve lost the best ones, the ones I grew up with who cared about me and were there for me and liked me for who I was.  Now I look for different things in my relationships.  I use to enjoy entertaining and have tea parties and luncheons and would invite a select group of women – I actually enjoyed their company — I didn’t even mind listening to all their mindless gossips about others, and after awhile, if there are more than three women, everyone talks at once and no one listens so I got bored.  Found it a waste of time, especially when no one would touch on topics of interest to me.  They didn’t want to talk about politics or books or anything too intense.  They wanted to make small talk.  What they would talk about was how much money someone made, how much their children make, the kind of car they drive or their expensive vacations.  If they want to impress me, it wasn’t working because I don’t really care.  Oh, and then there are others who brag about their many friends and what they do together.  And what’s even worse is when they talk about people I don’t know or want to know.  Why do they do that?


About valerieleeworks

Author of The Jade Rubies and A Long Way to Death Row, from many years of candid interviews with Charles Chi-tat Ng
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2 Responses to Being Chinese

  1. You are so right about “casual” friends. With real friends you share your interest and can talk about things that concern you – and they listen and participate. You’re that kind of a friend.

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